The Truth Sucks

In the whole history of the world, has anything good ever followed the phrase “truth be told”?  I mean, who really wants the truth to be told anyway?  (Actually, I do, I just hate the expression.)  Most people aren’t interested in actuality.  Most people are more than happy with the perfunctory, “I love your hair!” or “No, no, you look FABULOUS in those stretch pants”.  Translation:  “Your new haircut’s assy, and your ass is the size of Alaska.  Only, you can’t see Russia from it, cuz’ the gianormity of the shadow is blocking your view”.  We’re all so duplicitous, really.  That’s why we need people in our lives who will tell us the God’s-honest truth.  No matter the consequences. About our hair, fragrance, or new tube-top.  Seriously.  They just musn’t ever use the phrase “truth be told”.  Ever!

Product Review:  Avon NATURALS Vanilla Roll-On Anti-Perspirant
                          Deodorant

So, truth be told, I don’t like to wear aluminum anti-perspirants everyday, but there’s definitely a time and place.  Any stressful or strenuous situation calls for me to bring out the big guns:  Secret Scent Expressions Invisible Solid, in Truth or Pear.  (I swear, that’s the name.  I’m not makin’ it up.)  It’s effective, smells good, you can find it at any drugstore, and it doesn’t leave all that messy white crap on your armpits.  However, I’ve just found a new favorite.  I snatched this from Avon’s introductory sale at $0.89 for 1.7 fl. oz. (Item #952-735).  That’s right, less than a dollar!  Now, the regular price is $0.99, but you can handle that, right?  If you’ve been following along, you know that I adore Avon.  Furthermore, I’ve been in a long-term relationship with their NATURALS line.  I’m seriously committed to the Vanilla Nourishing Antibacterial Hand Gel, and havin’ a little hot-n-heavy on-the-side with the Moisturizing Body Cream (Did You Try? ... Gotta Buy!).  There was once even a summer romance with the body spray and I was briefly engaged to the hand cream, but ... it didn’t end well.  As a result, Avon doesn’t carry the hand cream anymore, and we won’t speak of it any further.  At any rate, the availability of layerable products in my favorite fragrance is a must and, in this area, Avon does not disappoint.  From Cucumber Melon to Red Rose & Peach, the NATURALS line provides you with a plethora of lovely scents to layer to your heart’s content, all at EXTREMELY reasonable prices.  You can get anything from lip balm, to hand soap, to shower gel, and more … in whatever delicious aroma strikes you that day.  Well, now even your pits can join the party.  I’m not usually a fan of roll-on, ‘cuz they take too long to dry (and this one does too), but it’s worth the extra prep time for the pay-off.  Unlike other roll-ons (and for whatever reason), this product does not leave white residue on your skin.  Fabulous!  (Said in a sing-songy way.)  While you’re applying it, it smells just as vanilla-buttercreamy delectable as all of its associates, but it doesn’t linger.  (A bit of a minus for me, but I know a lot of people prefer that.)  And … oh … of course, it’s effective.  In this 90 degree heat that Southern California’s been having, I still end the day smelling like a rose … er … um … vanilla pod.  OK, that doesn’t sound quite as nice, but you get the point.  The new NATURALS anti-perspirant is a much appreciated addition to this exceptional assemblage.  Now they just need to come out with an aluminum-free version for daily usage.  Until then … 4½ Stars.